There’s nothing like the feeling I get when the sun is streaming in the window, I’m cuddled up with a physical book, and I take my first drink of coffee.
Well, nothing except the happiness I feel when I see a group of older women playing cards together outside one of my favorite restaurants.
Or when I get a sweet text from one of my kids.
In a world where negativity often takes the spotlight, small moments of joy can easily go unnoticed. It’s time for us to pay attention.
What Are Glimmers?
Trauma therapist Deb Dana introduced the concept of glimmers. She used it to describe small, positive sensory experiences that bring a sense of safety, calm, and joy. These moments are subtle and fleeting, but they can shift your emotional state, helping you feel grounded and connected, even during stressful or overwhelming times.
Glimmers are the opposite of triggers. While triggers activate your body’s stress response, glimmers activate your body’s relaxation response, helping calm your nervous system and foster feelings of well-being.
While glimmers might seem minor or insignificant — a song that makes you smile or a beautiful flower during a walk — their impact can be profound.
But here’s the problem. We have to take the time to notice the glimmers in our daily lives. Otherwise, we just keep on with our busyness and stress.
How I Heard About Glimmers
My friend, Nanci, told me about glimmers a few months ago. Actually, I think she sent me an Instagram Story or something about them. I know the research on the benefits of gratitude and recognizing things you’re grateful for, so the idea made sense to me. At the same time, I thought the name was probably some social media nonsense. Me being me, I started researching.
Not only did I read up about glimmers and how the concept came about, Nanci and I also started sharing ours. Of course, I love being my own favorite project, so I started snapping pictures of some of my glimmers each week and sharing them on social media on Sundays.
The Science Behind Glimmers
Here’s the deal. This whole glimmer thing isn’t just some social media crap. There’s science behind why they work and what they do for you.
Polyvagal Theory
Glimmers are based on Polyvagal Theory, which in the simplest of terms, is the idea that our nervous system has two primary states:
- Sympathetic Nervous System (Fight or Flight). When we encounter danger, this system kicks in, preparing us to respond with increased heart rate, rapid breathing, and a focus on survival.
- Parasympathetic Nervous System (Rest and Digest). This system helps calm the body, lowering stress and encouraging a state of relaxation, connection, and safety.
A key part of the parasympathetic nervous system is the ventral vagal complex, which is activated when we feel safe, connected, and content. This is where glimmers come in. They stimulate the ventral vagal response, helping our body and mind relax and reset. And let’s face it, most of us can use more of that in our lives.
Glimmers and Neuroplasticity
Beyond the immediate calming effect, glimmers also play a role in neuroplasticity, which is the brain’s ability to rewire itself based on experiences. Repeatedly noticing and savoring glimmers helps create new neural pathways associated with safety and positivity. Over time, this makes it easier for your brain to naturally recognize and focus on positive stimuli rather than negative ones.
In other words, the more you intentionally notice glimmers, the more you’ll see and appreciate them, creating more of that positive response. It’s exactly like with gratitude. The more intentional you are about noticing the things you’re grateful for, the more of it you see, and the more grateful and fortunate you feel.
The Psychological Impact of Glimmers
This isn’t junk science, y’all. It’s so simple and real! Glimmers provide a way to balance out negative emotions and stress. They act as micro-moments of joy or comfort that counteract the effects of anxiety or overwhelm, enhancing our well-being and reducing stress.
Raise your hand if you want to feel more positive and less stressed.
Yep! That’s exactly what I thought.
Training Yourself to Glimmer
Confession: Every time I say the word glimmer, I sing, “I can still make the whole place shimmer” in my mind. Summoning Taylor Swift lyrics is kinda a glimmer in itself. Feel free to replace “shimmer” with “glimmer” if you want.
So, now you want the goods, right? You want to train your mind to see more moments in your life that make you happy. Here’s how.
Go Glimmer Hunting
Spotting glimmers may not feel natural in the beginning. That’s why we have to train ourselves. To do this, you may need to challenge yourself a little bit.
For example, choose a friend, like Nanci and I did, and make it a goal to send them a glimmer in the morning and one in the afternoon. It’ll keep you on the lookout for creative things to send.
Or you can create a challenge for yourself. Think: “I’ll find five glimmers today.” Then, jot them down in your phone notes, take pictures of them as they happen, or journal about them.
You don’t have to share your glimmers if you don’t want to, but I can tell you from experience that people respond positively when you do.
Surround Yourself With Glimmer Cues
Here’s the thing… it’s going to be more challenging to find glimmers if you’re naturally negative and surround yourself with crap you hate. Instead, as you think about this concept, remember to treat yourself like you’re someone you love.
Surround yourself with things that make you happy, whether it’s a candle in your favorite scent, your adorable grand pup (How many of my glimmers are this dog, y’all?!), or the sunshine.
There’s nothing that says you can’t set yourself up for glimmers. I do it all the time with a great pen, fresh sheets, or a fabulous piece of chocolate with my coffee.
Shift Your Focus From Negativity
If your glass is half empty and the half you have is full of piss, you’re going to have challenges identifying glimmers. It’s easy to get caught up in stress, frustration, or negativity. But glimmers offer an opportunity to redirect your attention toward positivity.
You will have bad days. Life will deal you some nonsense. But remember, you get to choose how you respond to it. In that way, glimmers are an extension of the gratitude texts I exchange every day with a group of friends.
Every day isn’t going to be good. Sometimes life is just damn hard. But every day still has glimmers.
Will You Glimmer With Me?
What do you think? Ready to make the whole place glimmer? Let’s do it! Will you glimmer with me? I’d love for you to get the benefits of looking for the small things in your days that make you happy. And I’d love for you to share them with me!
