I put my hand over my mouth a lot.
I’m an educated extroverted educator (say that three times fast). I have a lot to say and typically am surrounded by students who pay to hear my knowledge and advice. I spend the majority of my days talking.
This is the opposite of when I was a full-time journalist. As a journalist, I spent the majority of my days listening to sources. Sure, I asked questions, but mostly I listened—at least I think I did.
I always considered myself a good interviewer. In retrospect, I wonder if I did an adequate job of listening to sources and really hearing what they said.
Active listening is something I attempt to train student journalists to do. I also attempt to mirror it for them. This means really hearing what my students say. It also means resting my hand over my mouth when I feel the desire to talk before it’s really time.
Lolly Daskal, author of the Lead from Within blog and hostess of a Twitter chat with the same name, touched on this concept in her post, The Art of Listening.
Most people listen with the goal of responding, but listening is really about silence, Lolly wrote.
I often find myself wanting to respond. I have to remind myself to be silent.
Lolly also reminded her readers that listening means not judging, questioning or attempting to fix.
Listening, and truly understanding, is a difficult skill learned only through active practice. It’s also a skill that’s critical for journalists to master.
MargieClayman says
@allenmireles thanks for sharing @profkrg’s post – you 2 know each other?
allenmireles says
@MargieClayman Nope. But perhaps we should. 🙂
Shonali says
I think this is really key: “I have to remind myself to be silent.” I do too. And that’s why this is a great post, it’s so simple and reminds us of such an important lesson. Thank you.
profkrg says
Shonali I’m glad you enjoyed it. I find that the most important skills need to be practiced. They aren’t always intrinsic. Kenna
profkrg says
@seanmcginnis Thanks, Sean! I hope you have a great day!
profkrg says
@PaulBiedermann Thanks, Paul!
barrettrossie says
Oh my gosh, Kenna. If you want to start giving listening webinars, please invite me to attend.
profkrg says
barrettrossie I’m not sure I’m qualified, but I try! Kenna
mssackstein says
Kenna, I read this post with interest. Working with adolescents and raising a 7 year old, I wonder how much of my talking actually gets heard. I know that I’ve said to other adults and students alike that we aren’t actually listening if we are merely waiting for our turn to talk. We all want to be heard but actively listening is much harder.
I do lessons on how to listen but I’m definitely guilty of not listening so well all of the time. Making eye contact and asking questions really helps me stay focused on the speaker.
Thanks for this post, it’s a great topic to this about
profkrg says
mssackstein I’m glad you enjoyed the post. I have a difficult time listening, but I really try. My hope is that I’m getting better. Thanks for reading!
Richard Mize says
There is a difference in journalistic listening and the kind of genuine openness that leads to empathy, without which all you’ve done is heard what someone said.
Richard Mize says
And, professional detachment disallows all but the most basic human empathy. So, I think, the question isn’t actually about listening — it’s about accurate hearing and note-taking.
Prof KRG says
It depends on why you’re listening. Are you listening for journalistic, management, leadership, friendship, etc.
Prof KRG says
And, of course, we could debate the entire concept of “professional detachment.”
Richard Mize says
Well, you were asking about journalistic listening, or you indicated that you were (“As a full-time journalist” sort of frames it.) So I answered accordingly. 🙂 And, sure professional detachment, even in journallism, is a goal, its possibility, even its merits, debatable.